Random Acts of Kindness

It's a new year. For some it's trying to be a new you. A new diet. A new boyfriend. Whatever it might be, share the LOVE!!! It wasn't until last year that I started doing random acts of kindness. Why did I wait so long! (you must excuse my blog post that should have question marks in them as my question mark key is not working :p ) But really, why doesn't everyone do one random act of kindness at least weekly! I don't have them happen to me often..Very rarely actually. But I could care less about receiving. It's about giving! The feelings I get when I help someone or gift them something is incredible. And its plain as day that people don't see RAOK (random acts of kindness) often, because every time I do one; the person is blown away or I get some crazy look! It's quite funny actually. On Christmas Eve when my son, my mom and my self went to the mall to pass out reindeer guide and candy canes to random kids we got the strangest looks even though we said this is a RAOK. And one day while I asked to pay for the person behind me at Starbucks the cashier took a double take before she grabbed my card. One RAOK that left me giggling was on Christmas Eve when I left our mailman a thing of puppy chow in our mailbox with a note attached "Thank you for all your hard work. Merry Christmas, Enjoy!" I happen to be upstairs in the laundry room when he came and was looking out the window to see his reaction. He took a few looks at the house to see if anyone was outside or looking (to say thanks I'm sure) but he sat for about 3 minutes before he pulled off. I kept wondering what he was doing because we did not have a package.. No, no....He was chowing down on his puppy chow! LoL! It made me smile. A week later he left us a letter in our mailbox thanking us for the "not sure what that was but it was delicious!"
My point is...This world could use a lot more RAOK. I hope you can receive the joy that it has brought me in doing so!

Here are a few ideas of some RAOK:

1-Leave a treat for your mailman
2-Bring some bake goodies to your neighbors
3-Pick up the tab for the person behind you in the drive thru (I always ask the amount, just to make sure it isn't some ridiculous amount like $50.00! ;) )
4-Leave quarters on the gum machines at the mall, grocery store etc
5-Take coloring books to a local children's hospital and pass them around
6-Purchase $5.00 gift cards to Starbucks and randomly pass them out
7-Hold the door for the person behind you and say "Have a great day!"
8-Take water or can soda out to your garbage men
9-If you are expecting a package from UPS,FEDEX etc give them a little treat for the road. (They are hard workers you know!)
10-Make cards for the elderly in a local nursing home. If you have children have them decorate them.
11-Take a thank you card and treats to your local fire station, police station and hospital and tell them you greatly appreciate their hard work.
12-Send someone a card in the mail randomly with out having to be a occasion
13-Take your mom flowers with out it being a occasion
14-Pay someone's lay away bill at walmart or kmart (I do realize this could be pricy, depending on your budget you could always just pay some of it)
15-Call the electric or water company and let them know you would like to pay in full or toward someones electric-water bill. Ask if they can find one that is already pass due
16-Someone you know just have a baby, not feeling good, or stressed..Offer to bring them dinner one night
17-Go to a local playground and pass out $ store coloring books and a few crayons attached. Let the parents know before you approach the children that this is a RAOK.
18-Help the elderly put groceries in their car (Let them know it is a RAOK so they don't think you want to rob them)
19-offer a couple of hours of free babysitting to fellow friends
20-Give care packs to the homeless (travel sized shampoo,conditioner, toothpaste, toothbrush, bar of soap, and a candy bar in a gallon size zip lock bag.)
21-Leave small gift (travel size lotions etc) for your waitress
22-pay someones tolls behind you
23-Don't try to make money off of your old clothing-find someone who really needs the help and donate them.
24-Give your child's teacher a special gift with a card attached with your appreciation.
25-BE GENEROUS WITH COMPLEMENTS!!!
My list could go on but I hope this encourages you to brighten someone's day!

Praying for my child...

When I was young I was brought to church on and off. There would be weeks where we could go every Sunday and then months of spans when we didn't go. Then there would be years. I attended youth group occasionally for in my head it was for the social gathering and yet I don't think I ever walked away with knowledge of the Lord-sadly. Looking back I don't think that was my intention but I didn't have a relationship with God I should have had back then and my flesh was just not focusing on the words the youth Pastor would say. Truthfully I don't think I can re call where I actually felt like I had a personal relationship with God until after my brothers death. Even after it took a few months of pleading everything possible, praying for relief of heartache, praying for the pain to stop, and down right begging on my knees for God to save me. That is when I started to realize I was depending on God for my daily survival of my "new life" after death. As the 4 years and 3 months have passed I have fallen into the deepest love with God. I have a amazing personal relationship with Him. One that I wish I had started many many MANY years ago! Being that I didn't grow up in church, I have been left with out practically any knowledge of God besides the basics most everyone knows. I would continually pray that God would guide my heart on a path that would fill me with everything of Him. I have to say it has been a amazing journey and I would never turn back. God has answered so many prayers.
I think God hears all of our prayers. No matter how small or how big they are. My prayers varied from subject to subject depending on what my heart was needing that day. It wasn't until I started reading The power of a praying wife and the power of a praying parent that I realized.....My prayers NEED to be SO much more!!! That in my heart I knew what I wanted but I didn't quite pray for the specific things the way I should have been. Prayer is a powerful thing..
As I grow in my relationship with Christ every day I can only hope that Logan will grow up continuing to love God as much as he does now. That his heart will continue to thirst for more knowledge of God. I always felt these things but never truly prayed for them. The book the power of a praying parent has truly tought me how to pray. I just wanted to share one of them that gave me comfort in Logan's future in my prayers.
Lord, I pray for (Child's name) to have an ever-increasing hunger for more of You. May he long for Your presence-long to spend time with You in prayer,praise and worship. Give him a desire for the truth of Your word and a love for Your laws and Your ways. Teach him to live by faith and be led by the Holy Spirit, having an availability to do what You tell him to do. May he not have any allegiances or diversions away from You, but rather may he be repulsed by ungodliness and all that is in opposition to You. May a deep reverence and love for You and Your ways color everything he does and every choice he makes. Help him to understand the consequences of his actions. May he not be wise in his own eyes but rather "fear the Lord and depart from evil" (Proverbs 3:7)
This prayer made me realize- I NEED to pray this every day for Logan. I am saddened that my brother's death is what made and gained my relationship with Christ. I pray that Logan's is started from his heart and not his hurt like mine (of course mine grew to my heart thirsting for God!)
I feel that there are so many people out there that are not aware of the power of praying. A prayer from your heart, a true meaningful prayer...It's amazing and the best talk you can ever have with someone (Him!)

Amazing Generosity

Twelve days ago I posted a blog about a former co worker of my husbands who passed away in a tragic car accident caused by a semi truck driver that didn't realize he was stopping due to a traffic jam and going 65 mph slammed right into him. The truck driver was driving while impaired, had possession of methadone, possession of marijuana, and possession of drug paraphernalia.My husband told me today that the state of NC has said this is the worst accident in history in this state. Because of this careless person, A husband, a father to three children, a son and many more titles he carried has been taken far to soon.I was instantly touched by this and still tear up daily thinking about the situation. Today I found out that him and his wife had been married for SEVENTEEN years! I just couldnt imagne loosing my best friend. When I wrote the first blog post about the accident I said I was taking donations to help the family with bills,a grocery gift card, and to get the kids something. I had fifteen people make a donation that lead me to raise $300.00 for John's family!!! With the amazing help from these people I was able to pay $50.00 towards their next electric bill (the electric company said the next statement was Friday so perfect timing!), buy a $185.00 grocery gift card, get the basic school supplies for the twins going into second grade and purchase some goodies for the kids!
Tonight I went over to deliver the goodies for her. As we turned on her street my husband told me that the twins call their dad's phone every night to hear his voice. At that moment of course tears were coming! I had to sit in the driveway for a few minutes to compose my self before I walked into her house. Once we got in, there were quite a few people there so I didn't want to barge in on her company for to long. When I went to walk and get the huge bag of stuff to give her, the tears just started flowing. I told myself not to cry but of course couldn't help it given the situation!! Oh my heart just breaks for them. As I started showing her the kids goodies, she started to cry, the look on her face was indescribable as she was surprised. After I showed her all the kids goodies I told her that I had paid $50 towards her next electric bill and handed her the envelope with the grocery gift cards in it. I of course told her about the fifteen amazing people that helped me make this happen and she told me to tell each of you THANK YOU! Because of your generosity you impacted a life tonight that you didn't even know. A life that could have used a little smile tonight and you helped me deliver that smile! Here are the goodies I purchased along with the $50.00 towards her electric bill.

This is for the twelve year old-her mom said she loves B&BW!


This was for the seven year old twin boy


This was for the seven year old twin girl


I looked at the school supply list at the store and picked up the majority for her for the twins



Grocery gift cards





I want to send a HUGE thanks to everyone who prayed for this family! I know from my own personal struggle with my brothers death that nothing brought me out of my depression and sadness except prayers to God.Prayers area amazing and I thank you for thinking of this family! When I was purchasing all of these different items I had the greatest feeling inside of me. It felt so great to help this family. As we were shopping my little boy Logan kept saying, mommy can we get this present for the kids that lost their daddy. I was happy to have him be apart of this so he could learn compassion and caring. I was amazed that he didn't pick out one toy for himself but all for the kids. Each night we have added them to our prayers before bed. I want to send a HUGE thanks to those who could financially help:
Courtney Jozsa
Kristi Demeree
Cristina Smith
Joyanna Silverstein
Flo Ward
June Resler
Tiffany Todd
Jennifer Elwell
Chrissy Bengel
Eunice Henmen
Bryan Borsum
Ashley Hentges
Elyse Hurley
Jan Henderson and
Tara Burho

A life gone in a second...

This morning when I called my husband to chat he informed me that a guy he used to work with passed away in a horrible car crash yesterday afternoon. With out going into much detail I looked up the crash on local news sites. Little did I know it was this tragic and bad...
This photo is of his red ford truck smashed against the semi truck that hit him. I don't need to go into how bad it was because you can see in the picture just how bad it was. I met John once last Christmas Eve when he came over with another guy from my husbands work to ride dirt bikes and his four wheeler. He was a very nice guy. He had three children that I believe are ages 4 and twins that are 7. My heart just breaks for his family. As almost every blog post I write, I always talk about my brothers passing. I know the extreme pain, and heartache they are going through. My brother isn't replaceable, and neither is their dad. Three young kids that's now have to grow up with out their father. Why???!! Because a semi truck driver didn't realize he was stopping due to a traffic jam and going 65 mph slammed right into him. The truck driver was driving while impaired, had possession of methadone, possession of marijuana, and possession of drug paraphernalia. A state trooper at the scene said it was one of the worst accidents he has ever seen especially with so many cars involved. My husbands former co-worker was not the only one killed. He killed two others that were involved. These three kids thought their daddy was on his way home and didn't know they would never get to see him again. I just don't understand why people have to drink and drive and drive under the influence of drugs, let alone do drugs in general!
I have never met John's wife before, or his three children. Knowing the pain I have went through from my brothers death I can't help but have them on my mind ever since I found out. I thought loosing my brother was tuff. I thought going back to work was tuff. I thought breathing was unfair if he couldn't... Imagine how his wife feels who now carries the pain of loosing her husband and the father of her three kids who wont get to have their daddy anymore. Imagine explaining to your children that daddy isn't coming home, that he has gone home to Heaven. It doesn't matter if I have never met her or not, I feel in my heart I need to help her. I would like to set up a donation for his family. If every person who reads this, shares this, and they each donate $5, we can help this Mom that is now a Widow as much as possible. With a family used to two incomes, and raising three small children I want to help her as much as possible. With all the money I raise, I would like to buy her grocery gift cards, I would like to buy the kids something, and hopefully pay at least one of her major bills (electric or water) for a month. Even helping her this little, to her it will be BIG. After my brother passed away, we had people come in our home we hadn't seen in YEARS, DECADES! They brought us groceries, dinners that lasted forever, they cleaned..and we didn't ask for anything. When you go through this pain, and shock you don't think of any of those things. In fact, you could care less if you eat daily...Most of the time you don't want to eat! I ask that you please consider helping this family. I can promise you, that every single donation will be contributed to her. I always said that God will give me a purpose through my pain, helping others who loose a loved one. Any donation counts, large or small and it is ALL greatly appreciated. If you cant donate, I ask that you please pray for this family. For his children. Please pray that they will find peace in their heart.

TO make a donation you can donate via pay pal to email k_cole777@yahoo.com or send a check to Kristin Cole 1471 Remington Lane NW concord nc 28027. Either way you send it can you please note on their that it is for this cause. I will personally send you a thank you card with a receipt of all the bills, grocery gift cards that I have bought. Thank you in advance!

Your 4 year vision...

Tonight is a sleepless night. For no reason, just cant fall asleep. Whats a girl to do past midnight and cant sleep? Computer ofcourse! No editing for this mommy tonight but a glance through pictures. No certian folder just wanted to look at pictures. I came across my album from Sept 2008. Our trip to Sanibel Island for my brothers one year anniversary of his death. My baby was so small, just a little over 5 months when we went. My oldest brother didnt have his awesome gf, my sister was still a single momma to one, and we were all still grieving in many different ways....Ofcourse tears came flowing and thoughts came rushing back and my heart sank to my stomach. That year felt like it was a life time. It felt like it was more like 10 years. It was a very slow year. Everyday was filled with tears and heartache that felt like it was growing by the pounds and sitting on my heart. It was a year full of alot of different emotions for me from getting married, getting pregnant, loosing my brother, giving birth, and loosing Josh's grandma. You think a normal pregnant lady is emotional, you should have lived in my house! ;) That first year was L-O-N-G! As I sat and stared at pictures of our trip and then pictures of my brother I thought about the other 2 years and 9 months that have gone by. Where did they go? It doesnt seem like he has been gone for nearly 4 years. It feels like just yesterday I gave birth to Logan, celebrated his first birthday, celebrated his second birthday and boom now we just celebrated his THIRD! Seriously! THREE! I am so lucky to have such a amazing little boy who makes his mommies heart melt in a much different way then it used to 3 years and 9 months ago! I used to go to bed begging God to rewind my life..Now, I get so anxious to wake up, (literally I wake up at 5:45am and fight my body till at least 7am!) and see what God has in store for me that day. My life is so full of joy now! And I can thank Logan for every single peice of that joy! If you would have asked me 7 years and 9 months ago what my future would look like in four years, I wouldnt have said I would be dealing with a loss of my brother. If you would have asked me 3 years 9 months ago where I would be in four years I wouldnt have said HAPPY! I most likley would say sad,depressed and still trying to rewind my days back to sept 22 2007. We are never sure what the next day holds, or what our furture four years from now holds...But I do know that I can truley say I trust God for what his plan is for tomorrow,the next day, next year, and so on! I am so happy with where my life is today. It has taken some very bumpy roads and pulled a lot of things in and out of my life but God know why and will guide me! So when you think of four years from now....what do you invision?? It may not end up being what you think...But if you have Faith all will be okay!

If God is for us, who could ever be against us?!

I absoutly LOVE my daily emails from Joel and Victoria Osteen. They give me such a positive start to my day and keep me in focus on what is important in life. One of my favorite songs is Our God is greater by Chris Tomlin. If the song comes on while we are in the car or listening to the christan music channel on the TV you are guaranteed to know it is turned WAY up loud... Listening to that song can turn a bad day into a good day, a good day into a even better day. Knowing that God is with us no matter what happens in our life, money, jobs, housing, death, birth..Anything, He is ALWAYS there for us. Nothing can come between you and God. If you have God on your side no one can stop you. We might not see things happen to be in our way but they are in Christ' way. I am in the process of reading What a husband needs from his wife by Melanie Chitwood. You may hear the title and think oh gosh seriously?! But it is a awesome book! I HIGHLY reccomend it to any wife. In one of the chapters it talks about stop living by our flesh and live to what God wants us to be as a wife. WHOA! I never realized how much I live by MY flesh. I am so used to my habbits. I want to live fully for God and not just in parts of my life. This is a major part of my life im working on now is to stop living by what I think is right. Because even though 100% of the time I think I am, it may not be.

Here is my daily email from Joel and Victoria Osteen that I wanted to share:

What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us?”
(Romans 8:31, NLT)


There are many misconceptions about God in the world today. Some people think He’s mad at them, and other’s think He’s keeping a list of all their wrongs. But that isn’t what scripture tells us. Scripture tells us that God is gracious, patient and loving; that He is forgiving and doesn’t treat us as our sins deserve. Scripture tells us that God is for us, and if God is for us, who can be against us?

Think about that for a moment. The same God who created the heavens and earth, the one who spoke the universe into existence and knows everything about you, He is on your side and wants the best for you. I love today’s verse because it is a great reminder that when God is for you, no one can win against you. Not the pain of your past. Not any mistake you’ve made. Not the forces of hell, your worst enemy, a bad economy, a difficult housing market or anything else on this earth.

Today, instead of dwelling on what you’re not, dwell on what He is — He is faithful, He is loving, He is with you and He is for you! And with God on your side, you are headed for victory all the days of your life!

Oh horriable thoughts.....

The past week and a half I can not fall asleep for anything! I lay in bed and constantly think to myself that I might not wake up in the morning. No im not talking about simply rolling out of bed, im talking NEVER wake up! When I was little I used to have horrid fears that my dad would never make it home and I would never get to see him again. ( My parents were divorced and my dad was a over the road driver.) Sometimes I would lay in bed and cry because I was SO afraid that something would happen to him. Now that my brother passed away at such a young age (23) I fear that something is going to happen to me and I wont wake up the next day to my amazing husband and my precious little boy. For the past week or so I just lay there thinking what if i dont wake up? Will Josh know what to do? Will he know when to pay the bills? Will my boys know just how much I loved them? Will Logan replace me with another mommy? I tear up at all those thoughts every night. I have come to a conclusion to help me feel "better" and feel more secure that my boys can live on with out me if something was to happen today,tomorrow, or months from now, that I am going to organize every little thing in our life. Pictures will all be in albums, pictures will be put in frames and displayed, everything will be labled. Now dont get me wrong, I am a VERY organized person as it is but I still dont feel that is enough. I handel pretty much everything in our life as far as bills, budget, grocery shopping, etc. Josh has NO idea how to do any of it and that scares me! He once told me that if something happened to me he wouldnt know what to do when it came to bills etc! He said he didnt even know where I kept them... YIKES! I will write each of my boys a letter that will be sealed tight in my purse until the day something does happen to me. A letter for each of them knowning how much I love them and what I hope for their future. As a mom, and a mom that is SUPER in love with her son, I fear that if I did not make it one day that Logan will grow up not remembering me, or replacing me with a new mommy, or that everything I have taught him will go down the drain. Out of all my worries, leaving my son is by far the biggest fear I have. Writting letters to your loved ones incase you dont make it one day is not anything I ever wanted to do.. I hope no one ever wants to or enjoys it but it is deffiently something that will make me feel more comfotorable if something is to happen to me before Logan is at a age to understand the world and take care of things for himself. My goal is to have everything done by the end of March and each day until then and every day after that I pray that God lets me wake up each day to watch my son grow. I will blog some images after I finish all my organization!

I know you may be thinking I am crazy for even thinking about this but have you ever stepped back and thought... What if I am not here tomorrow?